Job Interview Protips ITT

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Gormal
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Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Tue Apr 15, 2008 7:56 pm

So as I'm going over stuff in my head for an interview this afternoon, I can't help but look back on the sage advice I got during the seminar the military puts you through as you transition back into the real world. We had a few really great speakers with some sage advice, and I feel obligated to share some of them with you.

1. Never ever wear a black suit, they are only for funerals.

2. Don't make the interviewer laugh.

3. Don't ever initiate a handshake because the interviewer could have 2 hooks for hands. (I'm not joking, he told us a story about how his friend supposedly ran into this problem where the person conducting his interview had 2 hooks for hands. He didn't appreciate it when I commented that the odds of this happening were so ridiculous that I doubt anyone should concern themselves with it.)
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Dalar » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:18 pm

Why not make the interviewer laugh out of curiosity.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Kifle » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:51 pm

Yeah, I don't get #2 either. A sense of humor is pretty prized in most places. Also, #3 seems, like you said, too rare of an occurance. I think it's respectful to offer a handshake.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Sarvis » Tue Apr 15, 2008 9:56 pm

Most of the best interviews I've had I made the guy(s) laugh. I impressed the programmers so much at one company that when the hiring manager didn't hire me (I failed to make him laugh) they talked him into giving me a second chance.

It's really probably more about reading the interviewer, I might have done better acting more seriously with that hiring manager for instance.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Xisiqomelir » Tue Apr 15, 2008 10:12 pm

So basically, the Navy tries to sabotage your future civilian employment with bad advice so you'll sign up for another hitch?
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Lathander » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:19 am

What's wrong with black suits? Best interview combo is black suit, white shirt and red tie.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:33 am

I think the part about this being bad advice was lost on all of you. I will make my sarcasm more apparent in the future.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Pril » Wed Apr 16, 2008 1:10 am

Gormal wrote:I think the part about this being bad advice was lost on all of you. I will make my sarcasm more apparent in the future.



try: <sarcasm> </sarcasm>
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 1:21 am

TorilMUD BBSsers are the lowest common denominator.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby avak » Wed Apr 16, 2008 1:36 am

Oh give me a break! This advice is garbage.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 1:39 am

See what I mean?
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Tanji Smanji » Wed Apr 16, 2008 2:09 am

Gormal wrote:I think the part about this being bad advice was lost on all of you. I will make my sarcasm more apparent in the future.


It's hard to get your emotional vibe when there's no cursing or emoticons in the post. You fucking nipplehead. :)

See?
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 2:17 am

I thought the fact that it was...yea know, bad advice... would give it away.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby teflor the ranger » Wed Apr 16, 2008 6:45 am

You guys are just... and you wonder why I argue with you.

Gormal posted that as a joke.

Black suits are not always bad (sometimes they're not the best, but dangit, some people look good in a black suit). No one who interviews you will have two hook hands, unless you're interviewing for a job using dangerous, hand eating machinery, and you should always try to show your employer that you have a compatible sense of humor. After all, they have to work with you.

Yeesh.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby avak » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:38 pm

To find the least common denominator, factor each of the denominators into primes. Then for each different prime in all of the factorizations, do the following...

1. Count the number of times each prime appears in each of the factorizations.
2. For each prime, take the largest of these counts.
3. Write down that prime as many times as you counted for it in step #2.
4. The least common denominator is the product of all the primes written down.

Based on some rough calculating, Gormal is right...Torilmud bbser's are the lowest common denominator.

Moderators: for the safety of all parties, could we please have threads like this labeled 'sarcasm'?
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:49 pm

Only if we can label certain posters as "retarded", "vapid", or "don't bother".

Edit: See below.
Last edited by Gormal on Wed Apr 16, 2008 6:33 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Sarvis » Wed Apr 16, 2008 12:58 pm

Gormal wrote:I thought the fact that it was...yea know, bad advice... would give it away.



The problem isn't that we failed to realize it was bad advice, it's that none of us had any reason to believe _you_ realized it.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Kifle » Wed Apr 16, 2008 6:32 pm

Jokes are usually... I don't know -- funny?
Fotex group-says 'Behold! penis!'

Kifle puts on his robe and wizard hat.

Thalidyrr tells you 'Yeah, you know, getting it like a jackhammer wears you out.'

Teflor "You can beat a tank with a shovel!!1!1!!one!!1!uno!!"
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 7:44 pm

Kifle wrote:Jokes are usually... I don't know -- funny?


But that would mean that you are funny.

Theory debunked.
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Kifle » Wed Apr 16, 2008 8:31 pm

Gormal wrote:
Kifle wrote:Jokes are usually... I don't know -- funny?


But that would mean that you are funny.

Theory debunked.


Straight out of the TeflorCombacks(tm) manual? You can do better, Gormal.
Fotex group-says 'Behold! penis!'

Kifle puts on his robe and wizard hat.

Thalidyrr tells you 'Yeah, you know, getting it like a jackhammer wears you out.'

Teflor "You can beat a tank with a shovel!!1!1!!one!!1!uno!!"
Gormal
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 8:57 pm

Kifle wrote:Straight
Kifle wrote:Combacks
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Kifle » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:28 pm

Gormal wrote:
Kifle wrote:Straight
Kifle wrote:Combacks


I don't get it. But, then again, I'm assuming there's something funny and/or intelligent to find in your posts. Maybe I should stop giving you the benefit of the doubt.
Fotex group-says 'Behold! penis!'

Kifle puts on his robe and wizard hat.

Thalidyrr tells you 'Yeah, you know, getting it like a jackhammer wears you out.'

Teflor "You can beat a tank with a shovel!!1!1!!one!!1!uno!!"
Gormal
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Gormal » Wed Apr 16, 2008 10:59 pm

Kifle wrote:
I'm ass here's something funny I should stop giving


blowjobs
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Ragorn » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:50 pm

Image
- Ragorn
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby Kifle » Wed Apr 16, 2008 11:53 pm

Gormal wrote:I R luv 2 grahmer an 2 spel i luv hav sex wit


Goats
Fotex group-says 'Behold! penis!'

Kifle puts on his robe and wizard hat.

Thalidyrr tells you 'Yeah, you know, getting it like a jackhammer wears you out.'

Teflor "You can beat a tank with a shovel!!1!1!!one!!1!uno!!"
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Re: Job Interview Protips ITT

Postby ssar » Thu Apr 17, 2008 8:00 am

Image
BEER

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